two weeks ago i did something i probably shouldn't have.

and now i feel insanely stupid

like i shot myself on my own foot. 

unfortunately i realised too late

I'm not sure if things will be the same again

and i am afraid. I don't know what more can i say.

maybe i had too much confidence, or simply too much held inside

but saying all that now is useless, it's beyond my control..

I guess i'm just not good when it comes to feelings. 

shaking the bottle and opening it all up was a careless mistake 

but it was also a genuine mistake; one i wouldn't mind making

it would have been cool if she felt the same

but the regret now is pretty obvious

i can only hope she understands that i've never done something like this before

and i cannot describe how awful i feel right now

all i'm looking for is some form of closure..

something only she can give and not one i can find

and hopefully everything will be back to normal

So if you're reading this and you even have the tiniest feeling that you need to tell me something, please talk to me.. Because I can't.  I don't want to exasperate the matter more so than I already did

I know 'it' might sound crazy, melodramatic and maybe even scary. But it's really what i felt.. 
So i'm not going to apologize anymore. I can only hope you understand