| February 17, 2010
A crack in the system I knew this day would come. Just me sitting on the chair. Staring nowhere and wondering 'now what?'. One prominent journey of my life has just ended last Friday. It was my last day of my internship at Aviva which also means i am now a poly graduate. I knew then, that i'd feel lost this week and lost i am indeed! I've got so many things to get settled, i don't know where to begin. What was once 'no time at all' has now become, 'so much time that i'm now lost'. I don't like this stucky feeling, lazing around completely in waste just trying to figure what is priority. And since time is all you have in the world, you really have the tendency to get lazy and push things off. Maybe having no time at all was better, because then, making a decision on what do would have been a whole lot easier.. Now that it's overflowing you're really just like 'now what?' Pls tell me it's not just me, haha i guess thats what the super rich are experiencing; not with time but with their money. they have so much of it, they end up dying without spending a cent because they couldn't decide what to do with it when they were still breathing. lmao. moving on, i saw a facebook quiz today, the title of the quiz went, "What are you addicted to" and i have reasons to believe that this might sound like something bad to most at first. But actually if you really thought about it, it seems more like a test to see if you had a damn life. And it was exactly then that i realised i didn't exactly have one - i could only fill three of the five compulsory boxes. And my three weren't even that good to begin with.. listening to music, watching movies and tumblr. not even a single healthy activity like perhaps going on a hike, cycling... actually in my case even the taboo gaming isn't all that bad a choice. You see, the thing is thanks to the education system here in SG and what our society is becoming (think the endless competition and stress) I've essentially become a completely boring person. Yup. I mean geez I used to do insane 3am night cycling all the time - and that's just one of many. Through the years, I've basically forgot what it was like to just have fun and forget about everything else. I am admitting it now - that not once in my 3 years since the Os have i not game for more than 2 hours without a drop of guilt. The aftermath of gaming is always something along the lines of 'i could have better spent my time doing something more useful' when all it used to be then was, 'oh that was fucking awesome, i'm so going to continue playing' And just as i want to start afresh, clear my shelves, throw every book away,, and flush all that nonsensical crap off my head, I can't. Why? because there's a Uni application i need to get done - and even that has a deadline. I am really tired and beginning to wonder if there will ever really be any break from anything in a life living in a bursting cityscape. I guess that's why I (or people) procrastinate; trying to push away what i can for as long as i can. If you asked me now if i had any regrets being in the last class and being probably one of the most badass student back in my secondary school days, my answer is great Big No.. not one bit. To do wild things is to be free. So what if i have a high GPA? i could bet i had more genuine smiles in a single day than the 3 years of my poly life combined. But that's still not the saddest thing. The sad thing is that once you're in it, you're pretty much stuck in it. You want to be rich? You want to be comfortable in life? Well, then you better have a darn certificate, it's the key to open all the doors. & how do you get the certificate? you'll need a degree.. and to get a degree?? you'll need to work your ass for it. Ironies of life? tell me about it. This is just the beginning. |
The Secret.  
The Need.
Graduate with a smile
The nice soft hair I once had Prosumer Camera (maybe) A good inspiration A long vacation A Car, a Bike and a Puppy Everlasting love? Whatever else that makes me happy My Escapes. Aaron Ng Aloysius Ong Christine Christopher Chia Cynthia Neo Elyza Jace Wong Johan Luke Chen Pamela How Priscilla Tan Regina Hoh Sheila Loh Sin Yean Sofya Wei Wen Yong Ann Yeng Ling Yimei Zheng Xin Shush. Have a blog? I'd love to link you! Just leave your link below & I'll be sure to drop by ;) Gone. July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 July 2010 August 2010 October 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 September 2011 October 2011 November 2011 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 April 2012 June 2012 July 2012 November 2012 December 2012 January 2013 July 2013 January 2014 February 2014 July 2014 August 2014 September 2014 October 2014 |